25 August 2012

The Importance of Reading in a Text Based RPG


Patrick slipped his headset into place, securing the ear piece and twisting the microphone closer to his mouth. He reached for his bag of Cheetos and grabbed a handful of the thin, corn nuggets, then tossed the bag aside.

Seconds later, Todd's voice streamed through the receiver, "First lesson of a text-based role-playing game is to find a target that will fight back and then see what happens after you attack it."

"Okay, so let's try that newbie farm you were telling me about." Patrick was anxious to get started. He wanted Todd to show him this mysterious new text-based game he'd been playing for the past six months.

"When you see a portal, just type enter portal and it'll teleport you to where I'm at in the game. From there, follow Marythtor. That's me. Oh, and don't forget to wield your weapon."

Patrick nodded once as an assurance to himself that he will follow and learn. Then he logged into the game.

####################

A portal

You enter the portal

You are transported through thin air and arrive at the Eastern Farm!

Marythtor, the swordsman

Marythtor opens a gate

Marythtor leaves east

You follow Marythtor east

You have entered the farmyard!

Marythtor, the swordsman

A Yellow chick

Marythtor looks at A Yellow chick

You look at A Yellow chick

You say, "I should attack the Yellow chick, right?"

Marythtor says, "That's up to you. But you'll never know unless you try it."

You attack A Yellow chick with your tiny fists

You are not wielding a weapon!

A Yellow chick bites you

You are gushing vital fluids!

You hit A Yellow chick with your tiny fists and do little damage

A Yellow chick bites you

You shrug off your mortal coil
















You must pray before you can do anything else

You pray

You have been resurrected in the Temple of Vivoria

Marythtor enters the Temple of Vivoria

Marythtor laughs at you!

####################


Patrick placed a finger to his headset. "Tell me I didn't just die to a little yellow chick."

"That was freaking hilarious!” Todd’s laughter bellowed through. "Did you read the description? Dude, that chick was like seven feet tall. Who the hell attacks a seven foot bird without a weapon?"

Patrick removed his headset and spoke into the mouth piece, "Good night, prick."

The End

If you liked this, you should play Threshold.



22 comments:

  1. I agree with Marythtor, that was hilarious! We have a text-based game on my kindle, not as interactive as an online RPG but there are various scenarios and on each page the player makes a decision that affects which page comes up next. (Does that make sense?) It is about dragons, and my kids loved playing it!

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    1. Pretty much, the decisions we make online can have some serious consequences. :D

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  2. Sounds like something that would raise my blood pressure! LOL

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    1. That, too. But if you have the slightest case of OCD, it can be very addicting.

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  3. OMG I have little else to say about this but LMFAO!!! I think I just disturbed every co-worker on my floor with my laughter. Nicely done!!

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    1. Haha, Randi! Glad it brought more than a smile to you. TEEHEE

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    2. When I first started playing, I really did forget to wield my weapon on occasion. It is painful when you die like that since you lose mucho experience points on top of your level.

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    3. A few years back I was an FFXI junkie...had four of my jobs maxed out to 75 and had beaten every quest you could imagine. But when I started I was your stereotypical newb. Brought aggro to my party every single time!

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    4. I never got into FF but I love watching the music videos on Youtube. Awesome graphics! I used to play Neverwinter Nights and Guild Wars, I just don't have the time to play much.

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  4. That is hilarious!!! Now you've got me wanting to go find a copy of the original Zork to play. I LOVED those when I was younger :-)

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    1. OMG, don't get me started! Text games are the bomb diggity!

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  5. Now I'm afraid to go to the petting zoo!

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    1. Awww, just be reminded, in a text based game there are always hints. A Yellow chick is out of place. But, a yellow chick is not. :)

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  6. LOL. I needed this after the long day I had. :)

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    1. Thank you, Kelly! I hope your day tomorrow is better! I'm still jealous of your 6 hours. :D

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  7. Nice! I love your RPG-inspired stories. You know, I STILL have Threshold bookmarked and have yet to try it out. Other, sexier games (like Skyrim) keep getting in the way. I'll get around to it eventually, when an old-school nostalgia wave hits me.

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    1. If you get around to playing, during character creation, please tell them "Pyrosama" referred you. :D

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  8. Hilarious!! I'm not a newbie anymore and I STILL forget to wield sometimes :p

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    1. Haha, Jami! I'm far from being a newb, but when I haven't played in a while, I tend to forget my directions and wind up getting killed anyway. :) It sucks, but is part of that world, painful as it is.

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  9. My twelve-year old is completely addicted to anything online. I sometimes wonder if he takes his headset off to shower!

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    1. It can get you at any age. Twelve years ago, I'd log in after work around 6:30 in the evening and I wouldn't get off until 2 in the morning or when my character got killed, whichever came first.

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