1. Go to page 77 of your current MS
2. Go to line 7
3. Copy down the next 7 lines - sentences or paragraphs - and post them as they're written. No cheating
4. Tag 7 authors
5. Let them know
I don't have enough pages to go down to 77, so I picked a page and went down to line 7, picked the first paragraph and copied 7 paragraphs since they are relatively short.
Lethal Injection
I’d run from my room down the hall to greet him, latching onto his leg, my head barely reached his belt with the secured holster and gun. He would pick me up into the air and twirl me around, "That's my boy!"
I was too young to understand when they put him on administrative leave. Mom just said money would be tight and Santa wouldn’t bring as many toys that year. Then the day came when there were other uniformed officers in the house. They put dad in handcuffs before walking him out.
“Let him go!” I cried out while mom held me back. I wanted to charge at them all, beat them with my fists. “You can’t do that, he’s the boss of the whole town!”
It was strange, you know? Because he was the big man and they took him away. I thought maybe someone else wanted to be the boss. If I knew the word for it back then, ousted is what I would have called it. Mom and I didn’t talk about it, ever. She just cried a lot. We even moved to another county when she was strong enough on her own, then to another state.
A few years later when I turned eight, we visited dad in prison. He was in a tan jumpsuit. His eyes were puffed and bruised and the glass wall between us reminded me of lines drawn in the sand on the beach not too long ago, dad daring me to cross over, teasing me. Mom handed me the phone and it was weird talking to him like that when he was right there in front of me.
“What happened to your face?” I asked. I would have called him dad but he didn’t look the same. He lost a lot of weight and he wasn’t larger than life, not like I remembered.
He said he had been lifting weights and dropped them. It was an accident. He looked sad, but I knew he would be okay because he was strong. I cried when we left him there to go back to Kansas. That’s where we lived, down the road from Grandma.
***
And, now I'm tagging 7 more unsuspecting writers!
Nicole Pyles
Ashley Chappell
Kimber Vale
Hillary Jacques
Lena Winfrey Seder
Kelly Hashway
Mysti Parker
I like that it's a boy's perspective. Way cool and very brave!
ReplyDeleteThank you Eve!
DeleteNice excerpt from your story. Wish I could read the rest. Just like a cliffhanger...so hopefully we'll get to finish the rest of your story soon!
ReplyDeletethanks for tagging me. I'll try to answer the tag over the weekend. Take care!
Thank you, Lena! I might think about posting it in the future. This one is complete, just never published. :D
DeleteThanks for the tag. I was tagged for this last week, so I already have it done. You can find my response here: http://kellyhashway.blogspot.com/2012/03/lucky-7-meme.html
ReplyDeleteThanks for the link! I can't believe I missed it! :(
DeleteFabulous excerpt, Diane! It really drew me in and made me want to know more. If the rest of your story is this good (and I imagine it is), you really must think about getting it published. Perhaps in an anthology?
ReplyDeleteMany thanks for stopping by & for your kind words about my artwork. Much appreciated. :)
--Susan
Thank you, Susan! It made first round cuts in one anthology last year, but didn't make the final. :(
DeleteI'm still considering publishing on my blog since it is short enough. If I get enough interest here, I might be doing it sooner than later! ;)
Hi Diane, I appreciate your taking the time to check out my blog so I figured I'd come and check yours out and decided to follow it. I look forward to reading more!
ReplyDelete*thumbs up*
DeleteYay, got another follower! Don't worry, we'll have fun.
Nicely done! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by, Margo. Glad you enjoyed!
DeleteWow! What an impressive engaging scene! I can just imagine how that character feels!! Way to go!
ReplyDelete!!!!! I know, but if I ever publish it, I think you all will be shocked. :D Thank you!
DeleteGreat job with the Lucky 7! I loved your excerpt. Going the paragraphs route gave me a big enough peek into your story to make me want more. Good luck selling it somewhere, but if it ends up here I'll be sure to check it out!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the tag! I'm glad I could share it. I was going to do the 7 sentences, but then it didn't go on long enough to have any real meaning.
DeleteGlad you liked it!
Is this from a short story? Reads very smooth and with lots of energy. I'd consider sending it off.
ReplyDeleteIt's part of a short story. I submitted it for an anthology (didn't make the final cut) and two contests. I know the saying is to keep submitting, but I'm feeling like I'd rather just share it for feedback, so I may just publish it to my blog. :) If I do, feel free to share it on Twitter, Facebook and emails.
DeleteAnother great read, Diane! It's amazing how easy you seem to make your scenes so life like. Not sure where your storyline will end up, but found myself pulling for all three characters in this family, wishing at some point the Dad would eventually recieve a pardon/second chance, and, in his absence, the Mother can catch some breaks to sustain and support her child and her self. Well-written...
ReplyDeleteThank you, Alan. That's a wonderful compliment. I try to cut out everything not needed to try and get a really tight read. I look forward to your feedback of the whole story when I post it. :D
DeleteGreat post! Thank you for stopping by my blog and the birthday wishes for my grandson.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Debra! Love me some birthday wishes. Every day I'm thankful I wake and every year deserves best wishes!
DeleteThat was great Diane! You made it look effortless and the scenes were truly alive!
ReplyDeleteThanks E! I hope you like the entire story when I finally post it. :D
DeleteGreat extract Diane! This meme is great, as it allows us little glimpses into other writers' WIP.
ReplyDeleteI was tagged by another blog - my post is here:
http://unpublishedworksofme.blogspot.co.uk/
I agree. On my way over. :D
DeleteThanks!